Scarred

would you believe me
if i told you
that i could forget every
obscenity
shove
philandering dalliance
and heartbreak
that i have ever endured
if doing so would
win back my original spirit?

the one that was
free to love
without jaded suppositions.
never questioned
hidden agendas
or significant others.
would you find it laughable?

if letting go of my past
meant a night of peace
huddled
back to belly
in a warm embrace
breath creating
a soft low rhythm –
i would do so
without thought.

but the truth is
that the heart
of a scarred sister
has a very long memory
and a surface
that toughens
with each encounter.