Monday, October 10, 2005


First and foremost, I love my new apartment. It's newly renovated and everyone will have their own space. Things are coming together.

I have noticed that recently, a lot of folks have posts on their various blogs related to love, soul mates and the like. I truly believe that we can spend so much time talking about it, that it prevents us from being about it. We spend so much crafting this "soul mate" that before we know it, we've created this mythical being with psychic, sexual and emotional super powers. Both men and women are guilty of this. Not only can it prevent folks from happiness in dating and relationships, but it can also cause them to feel pain because they have not come across this person. That's bananas to me.

Today we were having a discussion about the "roles" of men and women. A friend of mine was once told by a man that doing something in the way of home maintenance was not a woman's "place." WTF? I must admit that my father handled home repairs, maintenance, assembling ish and whatnot. I don't remember my mother ever having, or expressing the desire, to do any of that. However, I always wanted to know how to do for myself. So, for as long as I can remember, when he was fixing things around the house, putting together furniture, etc., I was right there. The same goes for my car. When I was married, I was right over my ex's shoulder trying to find out what was going on. As a result of that, I've never had to sit around and wait for a guy to do that type of thing for me. It's no slight against brothers, but I rest a little easier knowing that if need be, I can step in and handle business. When I got my enormously cumbersome computer desk, I put it together with some help from my little sister. I've done some of my own minor car repairs and have, on more than one occasion looked a mechanic dead in the eye and said, "Dude, seriously, don't try to dick me over" and all he could do was laugh. So far, the men in my life haven't seen that as an affront to their manhood. I also think that my dad is sort of proud that he gets the call AFTER I've already taken care of the issue.

I think I'm starting to grow up. I've stopped apologizing for myself so much. You're going to love me, hate me or feel indifferent about me, but I am who I am. I'm still willing to improve and change, but some things are undeniably Breez and I'm not going to try and convince folks to be with it. I was getting a little restless recently but I'm getting even more comfortable in my own skin. I've still got a ways to go, but I'm getting there. As human beings, we're all works of evolution in progress.

I missed my baby girl's first day of school since she's living with her father's parents for the moment, but from what I understand, it went EXACTLY the way I thought it would have. She lives about 10 minutes away from her school and it starts for 9:00 a.m. She was at the door with her backpack at 7:50. Ty is also doing well in school and I think that my new discipline tact is working. I do know that having a man (my brother in law in Shreveport, his grandfather in Algiers) in the home has had an impact on my kids, but all I can do is play the hand that I'm dealt and be thankful that I have family that looks out for the well being of my kids.


ExtraFlavory said...

I8 love when people have those Kameelah (Real World, Boston) ass list. Especially when they can't live up to a quarter of the stuff on the list. VIVA THE MOVEMENT!


The Humanity Critic said...

Definitely, people should just let love happen instead of overanalyzing about it. Cool post.

Amadeo said...

On that note I'll stop planning my moves for when I see Sade.