Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Sometimes you wanna. . .

Ok, Cliff Notes version of what's been going on with me:

I've had the blues. The frustrating part is that I haven't been able to pinpoint the precise reason why. I could nitpick at little things here and there and call them part of the problem, but I'm not sure they make a dent in the real reason.

Homesickness, however, is a mutha. My mother lived all over the country between the ages of 18 - 25. She said that after visits home, she would spend about three weeks wanting to sit in a corner with her legs folded over her shoulders. This feeling is partially attributable to the fact that I had not seen my family in over two years. That being said, I have felt a tug, not to return to New Orleans, but to be within driving distance of home. I haven't really connected with Maryland. It's not that I have not had good times here, and I've met nice people. Yet that has not stopped me from feeling like an island.

I'm giving it six months. I plan to give living here my all. If after that time, I still feel detatched, then I'll be searching for a place to live, closer to home.

One of my goals (since I'm damn near in my MID-30s - wtf) is to be more thoughtful rather than reactionary. Right now I feel like I wanna...


1 comment:

BLESSD1 said...

Oooh...the kid can relate! I loved visiting home when I was living in ATL, and loathed leaving. I guess someone must've been listening, cuz look where I am now.